embracing the uncertain.

May 30, 2012

I’m sitting in my hotel room in Philadelphia, on gmail chat with Sal, and listening to Julieta Venegas. My roomate, Jimi, is on her bed…. It’s 12:29am here and we are suppose to be downstairs and checked out by 2am. I got here yesterday around 7pm (east coast time). We had our staging/orientation today from 12pm-7:30pm or so, where we met our training group. So far, there are 31 trainees in our group, of which only 6 are guys.

Orientation/staging was pretty long but it was reassuring to meet the rest of my cohort and find that pretty much everyone has the same fears and anxieties- fear of being isolated, feeling unwelcome, fear of getting sick, fear of not integrating successfully into our communities, etc. It’s comforting to know that you are not the only ‘crazy’ (or so it feels sometimes) who is leaving all the comforts of their everyday life to go to the other side of the world to a place unknown, not sure of where we will live, who we will live with, and what exactly awaits us.

I think what I got from staging today is that sure, everyone is feeling these anxieties, but if your aspirations out-weigh your fears, then this shouldn’t be something that you can’t handle. I’m feeling excited, terrified, nervous, anxious, … pretty much a larger range of emotions that are hard to process all at once.

Well, the next time I write an entry I will be in Africa!

As for my friends and family- THANK YOU ALL so much for all your support and your words of encouragement. I love you guys and I miss you already. But I am excited to share this journey with you guys.

Wish me luck!!

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